Weight Loss Surgeon #2

After getting amazing news that my insurance company would cover weight loss surgery, I didn't waste any time. There was a weight loss surgeon right in Marquette and so I called and made an appointment right away.

I attended the group meeting and an informational seminar. This is when they really make you think about whether or not this was the right decision for you. I had NO doubts. This was going to turn my life around in so many positive ways. I just knew it.

I had private appointment with the surgeon. We went over my health issues, what I wanted out of this surgery, and he answered any questions I had. I told him I was beyond sure that this is what I needed. I was then scheduled to meet with a nutritionist, a psychologist, a cardiologist, and my general practitioner. 

The nutritionist and I went over what kind of diet I was currently on. All carbs! HaHa! With PCOS and insulin resistance, you crave carbs because your body is not processing them properly. We then went over what kind of diet I needed to be on before surgery. Low carb! :-( I needed to focus on watching how much fat I was eating, how many carbs I was eating, and limiting my portions. No big deal. Then came the diet restriction for after surgery. 2 ounces! OY VEY! First of all, even with a smaller stomach, how can 2 ounces sustain anyone? Well, she explained it in great detail. She then explained that I would only be on a 2 ounce diet for a short time, thank God. It was just a small reality check that I needed to make sure I was still game for this great change that was going to take place.

The psychologist was basically to make sure that I wasn't crazy. Well, I was kind of worried that I wasn't going to pass that one :-p Really, they needed to make sure that I was going to be able to handle the changes emotionally (and now looking back, boy is this a very necessary step in the process). I had to answer questions about my past that I had never really thought about anymore. I had to be aware that this had to be about more than just my fertility. Surgery may not fix my fertility and I needed to be ok with that. I wasn't, but I had to suck it up.

The cardiologist had to run a stress test and echo on my heart to make sure that I could withstand going through surgery. Let me tell you, that stress test made me so very glad I was pursuing wight loss surgery. Walking on a very high incline treadmill with wires strapped to me was not my idea of fun! Despite a heart murmur and a bicuspid narrow aortic valve I passed and was given clearance. 

My last and final appointment was to see my general practitioner to have some blood work done. No surprise there that they found elevated hormones, elevated liver enzymes, high blood sugar, and so on... but this was why I was pushing forward with the weight loss surgery, right? To change all these things. He thought I was a good candidate and gave his approval. 

All was done and I was ready to schedule my surgery. My emotions were all over the place. I had never had surgery before, this was a big deal. This was also something I had been working toward for so long. I NEEDED this. I called the surgeons office to schedule the BIG DAY and that was when I was told that insurance declined my request. They were not going to cover it. 

What? I didn't even know that could happen. Why did I go through all this just to be told no, again? Once again I was hurt and confused. I was told that I could appeal it. I had to write a letter to the insurance company explaining why I should be approved. So I did. When I got my response, I was told that I needed to undergo more testing to prove that this was medically necessary. At this point, I dropped it. I was overwhelmed and figured God was saying no.

What now? I felt like every corner I turned I was always asking God "What do you want for me? What do you want from me?"

I wanted to know what God was trying to teach me and I wanted to know it right then!

Reproductive Specialist, Round 2!

It wasn't long after Chad started his new job that I wanted to get back on track with a weight loss surgeon. I called the insurance company to find out if our insurance covered the surgery... after a few calls, the answer was no. No? What do you mean, no?  For whatever reason, I was under the impression that it was pretty standard for insurance companies to cover weight loss surgery. Apparently not.

I was devastated. It didn't even feel like I was back at square one, I felt like the door was slammed in my face and that was that. What was I supposed to do? What did this mean about our fertility? Where did I even start?

I decided to start with seeing an OB/GYN again and seeing what she had to say about my non-existent periods. When I went in to talk with her, she didn't seem worried about my periods, and after voicing my concern about my fertility she suggested Clomid and Provera again. I didn't want to. I wanted to tell her that I had already been there and done that, but I wanted to hold onto some kind of hope and if that meant Clomid and Provera, then I guess that was what I was going to do.

Chad and I tried another 3 unsuccessful rounds of Clomid and Provera. Very disappointing, but I wasn't surprised. At that point the OB/GYN suggested I see one of the fertility specialists that visited the area from time to time. I made an appointment and just prayed that we would find some answers. I prayed that some weight would be lifted off our shoulders. At this point, two years into our marriage and two years of "trying", I was starting to let it bother me more than before. 

Chad and I met with the fertility specialist... I didn't like him. He was quick, short answered, and just demanded that the tests we had done the year prior be done again. He also told me that as long as I was fat, that I wouldn't get pregnant. Thanks! Just what someone who has been dealing with weight issues for years wants to hear and definitely what someone who has been dealing with infertility wants to hear. It's your fault that you can't get pregnant, so drop the fork! Ok, so those weren't his exact words, but it might as well have been.

Back at square one, again! I was feeling all sorts of hurt and confusion. I thought our move was what God wanted for us, so what did God want for us in our marriage and personal lives? I was so very confused. My heart broke just thinking that this might be the end of the road, that this was a door closed and locked. My heart ached and yearned to know what God had planned for our lives.